A Racing Meaning Poem

Being in the Presence of the Best

There can be something

That is the best

About every race—

Even if it is not

The time.

Of course,

Usually when runners

Speak of, “the best,”

They mean time.

But if a runner

Runs enough races,

It is impossible

To always

Run faster.

And even with a race

That is planned for months

With meticulously scheduled

Workouts,

Sometimes things don’t work. 

For some races,

I can see it weeks in advance.

Weather was bad.

Workouts were missed.

Injuries.
Life gets in the way.

For other races,

It is clear that morning.

Bad night’s rest.

Something eaten didn’t sit right.

Too hot.

And sometimes it is during the race

That it becomes clear

That it will not be the fastest.

But it doesn’t mean

That there can’t be something

That is the best.

And if I pick out

What I think

Might be best

In advance,

And think about

Being in the presence of the best,

Then the race can still be one

To remember.

Scenery.

Most constant pace—

Even if not the fastest.

Meeting other runners.

Helping someone

Who would otherwise

Be behind me,

By encouraging them

As they run

Alongside me—

Or ahead of me.

Or maybe smiling more.

Or maybe just

Taking the time

To take in the sights

And sounds

And smells

Of the race.

Doing this will ensure

That the race will be

More than just

A few random bytes

With a name, date, and time

In my electronic device.

It will be a story

I can someday share
With my children’s children.

More Simple Gifts

Today, I had my first run in New Hampshire--ever.  Some places I go I have run at conferences.  But I have never been to a conference in New Hampshire.  In fact, as mentioned yesterday, I haven't been in New Hampshire since I was 9.  So I probably "ran" somewhere at that time.  But it was just that as a kid I was running as part of play.  Rather than running for the sake of training.  Although, I have commented before that running is one of my grown up forms of play.  Today's run can be seen at http://connect.garmin.com/modern/activity/532704711 with all the hills in all their glory.  Mostly down for the first mile and a half.  Then back up.  The mostly down for the next two miles.  Then back.  All good.  I even spent a half mile in and a half mile out on the local cross country trails.  

Where does that put me on my virtual pilgrimage--at mile 1054.  That is 14 above 40 per week for the first 26 weeks of the year.  Definitely at or beyond where I planned to be.  I think I am in a great position to make my goal by year's end.  In the meantime, I am on the outskirts of Weaubleau Missour on US 54.  No very nearby Catholic churches.  There is a Baptist church in Weaubleau.  I would have to think about what type of direct exposure I have had to Baptist churches. If this run were really across America rather than only virtually across America, I would probably stop for the sake of learning about the Baptist church a bit.

So, the run was slow.  8:55/mile.  It was a great way to see the area.

And that brings me to another day of simple pleasures after my run.  Sherry and I started from Wolfeboro, went to the Castle in the Clouds (a fascinating mountain top estate in Moltonborough, NH), and then went to the the outlet mall in Tiltin, NH.  That allowed us to circumnavigate Lake Winnipessaukee.  So much like my run of going out and back, we went out and back together.  We spent the long day together from chatting even before I ran (I didn't mean to awaken her at 6), the my fixing her breakfast when I came back (a yogurt, granola, strawberry, blueberry, blackberry parfait), to the drive to the castle, to seeing "The Pebble" and the Falls of Song at the first stop, to seeing a cool scenic overview, to walking around the house at the top and reading all the interesting notes about the historial details together, to having lunch at the cafe.  It was a big lunch.  Each of us had a soup as part of our appetizer.  I had clam chowder.  Sherry had a lobster stew in a tomato base.  Both were good.  And both were serious bowls.  We also got Bavarian pretzel bread sticks with an awesome cheddar sauce.  That was a lot.  Then I got an English pub burger while Sherry got a lobster roll.  We needed the lobster role explained to us.  Our very pleasant waitress, Rachel, was surprised we needed lobster rolls explained to us.  We topped it off with a chilled bottle of crisp white wine.  Not usually wine for lunch, but it worked on the warm day on the patio.  We took long enough and ate enough that the wine didn't affect us.  We got a book at Lucknow (the original name of the estate) at the gift shop. Then we drove to Tiltin.  We started with cold drinks from Starbucks.  Then we went into nearly every store that sold something other than just kid stuff.  In the end we bought only four items.  But it was a great way to walk off the food and fullness from the huge lunch.  I carried everything we bought to allow Sherry to have her hands free to look and try a few things on.  Then we drove back together.  Sat together catching up on emails.  Then, I served water, cherries, and chocolate.  We didn't need much food.

But once again it was just about being together.  Enjoying presence.  

And tomorrow will be another great day starting off once again with a run.   

A Road Called Rainbow Run

Today I ran eight miles—that is not unusual. The fact that I ran outside shouldn’t be unusual.  But so far this calendar year it has been.  The only thing that has been more unusual so far this calendar year is running with others. I still hope to fix that, but for right now I am just enjoying running—even if it is by myself. 

Today’s eight mile run was down my street, over to Northwood, out to Northern, up the Alameda to Sherwood, down Regester, across Loch Hill, down Loch Raven, around the grocery story and post office on Meridene, back to Loch Raven on Northern, down to Cold Spring (police activity at the corner and I could not get the speed indicator to measure me at more than 8 MPH this morning), across Cold Spring to York, up York to Bellona, back across Northern to York, up York to Hollen, and then winding through Lake Walker back to my home.

What did I think of while I ran?  I thought of a few things today.

First, how many places of worship I passed.  Probably at least a dozen.  Baptist, Presbyterian, Lutheran, Episcopal, Catholic.  Probably a few others along the way.  A Catholic High School.   The many and varied ways that people worship and believe and live out their faiths.

Second, I thought about how I feel comfortable running through most of the northern part of the city from Falls Rd to Harford Rd and north of 25^th street.  As well as downtown. If I go back four years when I first got it in my head to train for a marathon I ran north of where I live.  Now, I run south quite a bit through all sorts of sections of the city.  I think of the city as my “canvas” for running.  Where the patterns of streets I run each day would make interesting designs.  Where I try to find new paths that form loops or crossing loops and avoid, like the plague, out and back when I run in the city.  And I am comfortable enough now that even when I run to downtown or to Lake Montebello or to Druid Lake, I don’t need to just do an out and back.  And I like to celebrate how comfortable I have become with my city.

But then I checked on where this puts me: 213.5 miles toward my goal of 2000 miles.  And where does that put me—about a mile and a half east of where PA-136 and PA-88 intersect in Monongahela, PA.  I would have run a bit along the Monongahela River.  That is one of the three rivers that come together in Pittsburgh where the baseball team once had a stadium.  Pittsburgh is where my most frequent long run partner for the last three years hails from.  I’ve heard they have a good marathon.

In the spirit of canvas (and I literally did not know this before I ran today), I would have run on a street called Rainbow Run Rd. Rainbows are many colors.  I certainly passed a “rainbow” of faith experiences today. 

Google had a rainbow of colors on its main page for searching today.  Maybe a sign of protest against the anti-LGBT issues being raised by the Olympics being in Russia. 

Once again, I find an odd sense of interconnectedness.  I think of the city as a canvas.  I pass a “rainbow” of places or worship (at least a Christian rainbow).  I find that I would have run on a road called Rainbow if I were physically on my 2000 mile question.  And rainbow is a symbol in the news. 

How all this interconnected stuff happens again and again for me is a mystery.  It will continue to be a mystery.  Maybe it is not so interconnected.  Maybe I just like to interpret it that way.  But if that helps me make sense of the world, so be it. 

That is ultimately what this is all about.  Making sense of the world. 

Run Before the Snow

This morning, I waited for the snow.  Yesterday, Sherry and I heard a National Weather Service emergency broadcast announcement around one in the afternoon that advised everyone to only travel in the case of an emergency.  Despite that, the schools that are relevant in my family didn't announce that they would be closed until after 5 AM.  So it goes.  But in the meantime, I did work. Then, I worked to make some bagel dough (bacon gouda bagels) before I went running.  I ran at 6:40 and got a total of 7.1 miles.  Just wandering-that was good.  In real life, I ran across Lake, down Bellona, down Springlake, across northern, up Charles, on Charlesmeade, Gittings, Bellona again, Stevenson, Sherwood, Overbrook, Holly, Weidner, Hollen, Yorkshire, Cedarcroft, Northwood, Woodson, Cedarcroft, and home again.  None of the miles were at a sub-8 pace and that was good.  It was an easy day.  Second day with new running shoes.  Total of 21.9 miles in the new shoes.  In my virtual world, I have run a total of 132.4 miles for the year.  That is about 44 miles per week.  The 7.1 miles took me past another cross over with the Pennsylvania turnpike, virtually past the Shawnee State Park, and through a little town called Schellsburg.  Not much else to report. 

A few other interesting thoughts.  First, the sunrise was beautiful.  While I had my phone with me and would have loved to take a picture, there was no where to stop with a good view of the horizon.  The sky was a lavender-red.  And the pinks on the undersides of the clouds were wonderful.  Wish I could share it, but perhaps that is just one of the joys that only comes to people who get up eralery.  

There is a woman who wanders York Rd and Northern Parkway regularly.  I often see her when driving kids to school.  I sometimes see her when I run.  I don't often say hello to her.  One of the first times I saw her was sleeping on the bus bench across the street from our church.  The one time I had said hello to her before, she sort of glared at me.  This morning, I chose to say hello to be consistent with what Back on My Feet always suggests about the importance of reaching out to others and after running with Back on My Feet yesterday for the first time in a while.  She actually smiled.  I don't know whether I made her day any better, but it felt like I may have.  I think again of Fr. Sam saying, "We Sing Anyway."  I experience joy. I try to bring joy to others.  And I do so regardless of the odds that it will make a difference.  I didn't know.  I tried.  I think it was better.

When I got home from running, we finished making the bagels. Not perfect as my sons had made them too big, but they tasted good.  After that, I took my middle son to the grocery store to get a few things we really could not do without for the day.  I love using the self-check out feature and we were in and out quickly enough (after leaving our house around 8:30) for me to be home by 9 for my first work call of the day.  What was interesting was that my son brought up the fact that yesterday was the Feast of St. Sebastian.  I had overlooked that in my writing about other stuff.  My son mentioned that he and my older one had thought about getting a cake and some icing to decorate with a reference to St. Sebastian but did not have a car to use.

The last two years I have thought quite a bit about the tattoo.  Planning in 2012.  Just finished in 2013.  So, what does St. Sebastian mean this year.  In his "double martyrdom" I'm not sure if he was singing.  I don't know what types of hymns they had in the third century after Jesus's life.  But he was shot by archers and kept right on going.  He "sang anyway".  What a symbol to be reminded of by my son on a day I acted out the "sang anyway" in a gesture toward another human being during my run.       
     
Final observations from mass yesterday.  When Fr. Sam talked about being peculiar or crazy, he specifically mentioned that the "other half" of the people who normally attend the 5:30 mass were probably home watching the football game.  It was unfortunate for so many to be away on a Sunday when being together as a community was so important.

Fr. Sam also talked about Martin Luther King's speech in Memphis about going to the mountaintop but not necessarily reaching the promised land.  Another part of the "sing anyway" theme.  And important to recognize that there are so many ways to keep singing.  He mentioned that many people who bring messages of hope are eventually "taken out" by someone who feels threatened by the hope they bring.  He commented on the concern that someone may want to take out Pope Francis given his message of hope.

I'm not sure what I think about the sentiment that everyone who tries to bring hope gets taken out.  But it is food for thought.

Do I help to bring hope?  I sure hope so.  But I write for my own purposes and just believe that others will find hope in what I write.  In how I act.  In how I see life.  In how I approach life.  And that they will join me in that hope.  

Running before the snow was hope.  Life is hope for me.  I hope that life is hope for many others.   

A 2000 Mile Quest

This morning I went for a run.  That is nothing unusual.  I went for a run on 260 days in 2013.  So, going for a run on the second day of the yar in 2014 is something that I would expect to do on approximately two out of every three days anyway. 

But I learned something about myself today.  First, I must be building up a reputation for posting pictures of my watch.  A friend wrote a post today with a picture of his Garmin and noted “in true Professor Frick style”.  He had the opportunity to run 16 miles in about two hours.  That was almost twice as long as the time I had available to run—I ran just under 1:04.  And that was twice as far as I ran (I ran exactly 8 miles).  So, his pace (based on the twice as far in less than twice as long) was obviously faster than mine.  I have not run with this friend in quite some time.  I noted that I look forward to running with him but that I will have to work to keep up with him next time.  That’s also not really a surprise.  If I had run the Charles St 12 last year, he would have been way ahead of me.  In the Baltimore Running Festival half marathon he was well ahead of me, although not nearly as much as he’d planned.  The only race in the past twelve months for which I had the lead was the Boston marathon.  There, we ran nearly even for about the first half and then I had the lead.  It was the third marathon (and fourth race overall) where he was ahead or we were even but I eventually took off.  The other three times it was much closer to the end of the race.  But on any given day for any race less than twenty miles, he will be way ahead of me unless something goes seriously wrong.

But that is part of why running is such a cool sport.  Many of my friends are impressed at what I do.  The distances I go each day.  The distances I go in a year (1867 miles last year).  The pace at which I run.  But then I look at what some of my friends manage, and I realize that my running is neither as fast nor as far nor as consistent as many other people. 

This is the first year I recall lots of people posting about how many miles they ran during the year.  I have several friends over 2000 miles.  I have one friend who was a little closer to 2000 miles than I was.  And I have friends with a variety of shorter distances that either they achieves last year or are looking to achieve in the cominb year.  And, in the end, all are fine.

I posted online this morning that I was happy with my overall 1:03:40 for 8 miles as other than a 14.4 mile very hilly run (at least noticeably uphill in the second half) on the winter solstice, I had not run much that included hills since the 5 mile race on December 14.  And, for six days in a row, I had run nothing but treadmill miles—nearly all at an 8 min/mile pace with the most slight incline possible.

So, today, I began by climbing Highwood, running the down and up along Lake to York, and then the relatively flat from Lake and York to Lake and Bellona and then along Bellona toward Springlake Way for the first mile in 8:12.  Then, I ran down Springlake Way to Norhtern, across Northern to Charles, and up Charles toward Stevenson for the second mile in 7:55.  After that I continued along a relatively flat Charles, then hung a right on Stevenson toward Bellona and then downhill along Stevenson after crossing Bellona for mile 3 in 7:55.  Next, I ran up Stevenson toward Osler and then down Osler toward Towsontown—hitting 4 miles before I hit Towsontown.  Fourth mile run in 7:53.  Then, I continued along Osler, hung a right on Towsontown, and then around Bosley headed back toward York Rd, hitting mile 5 right around York and Bosely.  Mile 5 run in 7:53.  Along York Rd toward Regester, hitting 6 along York, with mile 6 run in 8:01.  It’s a bit more up on York Rd than meets the eye when driving.  Then, along Regester to Sherwood.  Hit 7 miles right about there with mile 7 in 7:58.  Finally, finished by taking Sherwood to the Alameda, then Walker, Northwood, Woodson, and home.  Last mile in 7:51.  Relatively consistent.  Home in time to eat, shower, get Christopher to the light rail, eventually pick up the dog, do some work, take Joshua to TWIGS, and go to SPH to record two lectures. 

What I learned while I was running was not just that I had not lost anything on my pace during my 10 days without hills, but that I really do enjoy the hills.  Maybe not a hill workout but definitely a workout with more variation that I get on most of my treadmill workouts.  I love the sounds of the city.  I love the smell of the city.  I love seeing the outside—more than I could ever enjoy any number of minutes or hours of watching TV while running.  I love being in running tights, a long-sleeved shirt made for cold weather, and a long-sleeved t-shirt.  I love seeing people with their dogs.  I love seeing other runners.  I love saying hello.  I love being a part of the early morning community.

Of course, I would not run outside in bitterly cold temperatures.  And I would not run on the streets with ice and a risk of falling that is more than the risk I already face on the sidewalks—which I have fallen on once or twice. And there are only certain parts of the city I will run in by myself.

And I learned how far I am willing to try to push myself this year—I wrote that I am on a 2000 mile quest.  If I simply run 1:04 per day at the same pace for each of 250 days, I’ll have the 2000 miles. I don’t need any 10 mile races.  I don’t need any half marathons.  I don’t need any marathons or ultras.  And 250 days is fewer days than I ran in 2013.  So this is very doable.

What will I have to overcome?  Well, sometimes the workouts can take much longer than 1:04 when I drive somewhere to run.  And sometimes I won’t run at an 8 minute per mile pace if I am running with certain friends.  And there will be times that I just won’t have the 1:04 even without needing to drive.  And there are times when I will want to go further—and run either a half marathon or a marathon. 

But each run will bring a lesson.  Each run will bring a meaning.  Each run will bring a revelation. 

Something about me.  Something about a friend.  Something about life.  Something about running.  Something about my city.  Something about my shoes. 

And I will take it all in. 

And I will write it all down.

And I will share it with anyone who wants to read.

And I will continue to try to understand the meaning of life.  How I fit in.  What I am called to do.  And what God’s plan is for me.

Other than to run and write and teach and learn and be the most supportive person I can be to my friends and family and students and colleagues.

Life is good. 

Mother Nature's Prank

This morning I was preparing to go to the Dunbar track for a workout at approximately 4:55.  As I put on my contact lens, got dressed warmly, and raced out the door to try to avoid being late, I noticed that it seemed to be sleeting.  As I quickly sat in the driver's seat of my car, I noticed that I had somehow missed a call from one of the two people with whom I was supposed to run.  As I quickly called my training partner back (I don't usually call people at 5 AM), the sleet continued.  We decided that since we did not know how long it would continue, we would call off our workout. 

As I checked on how much more to expect, I noticed that the local online weather indicated "light ice pellets".  That term surprised me, so I posted about it on Facebook.  Much to my surprise, the post ended up with more than a dozen comments about the difference between sleet and ice pelled.  My one friend who is a trained meteorologist commented that the term ice pellet was more accepted internationally.  So I joked that just like The Artist Formerly Known as Prince (see the symbol to the right), I could call the weather The Precipitation Formerly Known as Sleet.  Clever, perhaps.  But some friends claims their local weather coverage said there was still a difference.  

More importantly, as I returned to the warm interior of my house, it gave me a chance to rethink my priorities for the morning.  Yes, I would have loved to do a track workout.  We had planned 800 meter intervals and I would likely have done six or more at a very quick pace.  But instead, I began by making semolina flour pizza dough.  It ended up making a decent dinner, but my eight year old is rarely sufficiently patient to get the best pizza out of a dough.

Then, I took my dog for a relatively long walk.  She was incredibly happy.  That made me happy as well.

Next, I did run.  Just 3.1 miles at an easy pace.  But that was what I needed.  No pressure.  No hype.  Just a relaxing opportunity to use my legs and get the heart going a little.

Then, I went to the grocery store.  And eventually, I did make it to work on time and had a good day at work.

So, my friends and I decided not to take a risk and instead of getting a great workout and feeling incredibly pressured otherwise, I got a good workout and had an opportunity to take care of some other quite important things.

That is a good lesson to learn--sometimes a change in plans creates new opportunities.  Each change should be taken not as inherently a setback but as an opportunity to take another path that may turn out to be even better.  

40 Days to Better: Day 39

This morning's run was supposed to be an easy 4 mile run just to get the legs to be loose.  Nothing major, now it is a matter of waiting, although I will sneak in a run on the day before the race.  And sometimes, to quote the song (for the second straight day I am quoting a song) from Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, "Waiting is the hardest part."  Waiting the last few days before a big race is almost always like this.  Although this taper is not the same as any other taper I have ever done.  Waiting is still hard.

What I actually ran this morning was--nothing. I don't think that running with a resting body temperature over 100 is a good idea.  So, that makes this taper even more unusual than any other. 

That is an important lesson to teach my kids.  Waiting is important.  Patience is important.  Some things can take a while to become a reality.

One thing I had to wait for recently was to see what type of story was written about my combined Boston/Baltimore experience.  In the end, the part of the story that got the most attention was about my thinking about the eight year old who died.  Apparently that is an attention getter as this is the second time that something like this has gotten someone's attention for a story.  Even six months later.  I like the fact that my shoes got a mention.  But I had to wait more than a week to find out how a 30 minute conversation turned into an interesting story in the Sun.

This is also an important lesson to teach students and others I mentor or lead professionally.  Waiting.  Patience.  Making sure that everything is in place.  Then making a decision and taking an action.

Leadership is something that I have thought a lot about since I changed jobs and a lot since I have started the forty days to better.

I have looked at some changes in my leadership in the past six months.  I have talked to the people on my organizational chart a lot more.  (I was supposed to yesterday afternoon but instead went home to sleep.  My voice would not have been in good shape by the end of an afternoon of talking constantly.)  When I run meetings, I don't always sit at the head of the table any more.  I try to be part of the group, even if I am nominally the head of the group.  I also have made it a point to make sure that everyone gets a chance to express an opinion.  I have made it a point to follow up more quickly on things.  So many changes.

The book, The Answer to How is Yes, pointed out a term called social architecture.  It talked about things like choosing where to sit.  Choosing how to position the table.  Choosing how to show priority or equality.

I know I still have a lot to learn.  A lot to learn about leading.  A lot to learn about mentoring.  A lot to learn about helping others to achieve all they have the potential to achieve.

And the learning will probably continue for as long as I am in leadership positions.  This is not a once and done type of thing.  This is part of me for the long haul.  

40 Days to Better: Day 33

Since I started running marathons, running has become a very analytic activity.  What is my split at each 400 on the track?  What is my time per mile?  Am I too fast?  If I run too slowly can I make it up later?  Should I go a lot faster on the downhill or hold back?  How can I manage to keep anything close to my usual pace uphill?  So many questions.  Seeking so many answers.  And spending so much mental energy trying to find them that I often waste not only mental energy and concentration on the goal of finishing in the quickest time possible (while I worry about the most consistent time possible instead) but also physical energy.  And when I waste concentration and physical energy, I end up running times slower than I hope for.  I have commented numerous times in different settings about running with my head rather than just with my heart.  Running with a plan is not a bad idea.  But spending too much time and effort obsessing about the plan never got me a better time.  

So, today's lesson was about running with my heart rather than with my head.  This morning, I woke up after 4:30 and had to do dishes.  I anticipated being able to get out to run regardless--and hopefully got for five miles.  In the end, I ended up doing just a 2.6 mile run.  Nothing wrong with that.  A ran a ninth day in a row.  It is there, that I begin the thinking about running with my heart rather than my head.

And, so, we have another poem...

If I Had Run With My Head
If I had run with my head
Rather than with my heart
Things would have been different this morning.
My head would have looked at the analytic side.
My head would have said, "You've run eight straight days
Before today.
What would Coach Marie say?"
And I would have thought to myself about how Coach Marie
Taught me
And others in the Charm City Run training group
About the need
For rest.
My head would have looked at the analytic side.
My head would have said, "It is only nine days till race morning.
What kind of taper are you doing?
You are avoiding tempo, but that
Is nothing new.
But why are you running so much?
You won't increase speed.
You won't increase endurance.
Just ease up."
These things I have heard many times.
My head would have looked at the analytic side.
My head would have stopped part way through the systems check
Before the run.
Legs--okay.
Heart--ready to pump it up.
GI--not feeling so good. 
In knots for reasons I can't figure out.
My head would have said, "Why run?
When the body feels this way?
On top of all the other things."
My head would have looked at the analytic side.
My head would have said, "Isn't three strikes enough
To be out?"
But I am learning not to run with my head.
I feel much better.
I am learning to run 
With my heart and legs.
Two's company--and three's a crowd.
So the head gets left out.
And when I listen to my legs and heart.
The legs are always ready.
The heart whispers just two words,
"Build 
Confidence."
That is why I run.
Build confidence--to complete things.
Build confidence--to work through things.
Build confidence--to keep going.
Build confidence--in those around me.
Build confidence--in myself.
Trust myself.
Trust my heart.
And no more words need to be said.
It was clearly time to run.

What I need is to take the attitude expressed at the end.  The attitude of working toward a goal.  The attitude of having confidence in myself and others. The attitude of trusting my heart.  And take that into the rest of my life.  On the road to better. 

40 Days to Better: Day 32

This morning I could have chosen not to run.  In fact, at one point on Facebook, on the site of a friend who talked about her own tempo run and asked how many miles people were going, I commented that I may take the day off.  I didn't.  I ran a simple 3.2 miles.  Used to be--when I drove to join a group to run three or four times a week--that I didn't think that anything less than 4 miles was worth it.  Now, I run 3 or so on a regular basis.  Partly because I don't need to drive.  Partly because I feel like I just have less time.

The run came after doing some work, washing dishes, walking the dog, and making bagels (not in that order).  I paid for it with a little fading in the middle of the day but had a very nice class that I taught this evening.

What did I learn from my experience in the universe today?  I'd like to put in terms of a free form poem:

This morning I could have chosen not to run.
This morning I could have chosen not to go in a 3.2 mile loop.
This morning I could have chosen another 26 minutes of something else.
But if I had, I would have missed so many things.
I would have missed the opportunity to see the city come alive.
I would have missed the beautiful color of the sky before the sun rises.
I would have missed the opportunity to use my legs for more than I do the rest of the day.
I would have missed the opportunity to breathe deeply and fully.
I would have missed the uphills.
I would have missed the downhills.
I would have missed the sweat that runs down my face when I make an effort.
I would have missed the experience of engaging fulling all my senses in life.
And that would be sad.
This morning I could have chosen not to run.
But I didn't.
And life is good.

The key for me is that this is not just about running.  There are many choices I make in life.  I can choose to do or choose not to do many things.  I can choose not to engage.  I can choose to disengage.  But every time I make such a choice I miss an opportunity to experience life fully.  I should stop making such choices and engage fully in the life I lead with the people I have chosen (or been blessed) to lead it with.  

The idea of choosing to do rather than not do is not something to be taken lightly.  It is something to be cherished and enjoyed.  And the joy of the experience should be shared. 

40 Days to Better: Day 12

As I write this blog entry on a Friday evening, I realize that tomorrow will be exactly four weeks until the Baltimore Running Festival and my main distance race of the fall.  I hope that I am not feeling like I did this morning in 28 days and 12 hours.  If I do, then it will not be a fun race.  It would not be a bad race in the bigger scheme of things.  I did, after all, average 8:18 this morning over eight miles.  However, that was only because I ran a good last half and two sub-8:00's for my last miles.  Without those I would have been well over 8:30 after cruising through 20 at 7:48 last Saturday.  I felt horrible.  Especially during the first 3 miles.  Not injury.  Not pain.  Not even cramping.  Just that the legs would not "go" as I know they could.

So, I asked myself why?  Why did I continue?  Because I know it is good for me.  

I also asked myself why I felt the way I did.  I came up with a number of things.

Too little sleep for several days.

Too much stress at work in this particular week.

Ate dinner too late last night.

Ate two microwaved pot pies for dinner last night.

Not enough fluids yesterday.

Still a bit warm this morning.

The list goes on.

Too many variables.

Anything could be slightly off.

It is also a reminder as I look at this list of how I am probably trying to cram in too much.  That leads to too little fluid, too little sleep, eating at odd hours, and eating odd food.

The lesson for the day on the road to better--sometimes there are limits.  I should respect those limits.  If I do not, I may risk it all.  Good, bad, and otherwise.  And I would choose not to do so, if given a choice.