64 is 2 to the Sixth

The title of today's blog is a statement of mathematical fact.  Why is it relevant today?  I did not run 64 miles.  I only ran 6.4 miles.  For a total of 273 one day before the end of the seventh week of the year (tomorrow will be day 49).  That puts me at an average of 39 miles per week (with a week of only 33 miles over just 4 days).  On track for my 2000 for the year.  And I'm on US 40 in Ohio now.  State #4 on my journey.

So why the mathematical statement.  Well, I ran 6.4 because I got to the Y a few minutes late to do a full hour.  And I wanted to get to 273 total.  So, 6.4 worked.  And being the nerd I was as a kid (the guy who had all the powers of 2 up to 2-to-the-sixteenth memorized), I made a connection.

So, on yet another day of treadmill running, Since one of the themes of any additional art that I might commission some day (tattoo or otherwise since Sherry is not thrilled with the idea of another tattoo) is a cornucopia, I thought about six things that have doubled (rather than just doubling one thing six times) since I started my serious running again in 2006/7.

(1) My love of running.  This year so far it has been solitary again, but it is social as well as physical.  It is spiritual.  And it is critical for my sense of well being.

(2) My appreciation of the talent it takes to play music well.  While I have stopped playing so much music myself over the past year, I watched how little progress I was making.  And I watched my oldest son and his girlfriend continue to develop.  I saw what it takes.  I saw how long they worked and how hard they worked.  And I realize now more than ever just what it takes to become an exceptional musician.  Similar to what it would take to be an exceptional academic.  Or an exceptional writer.  Or an exceptional runner.

(3) My appreciation of art and what it takes to make good art.  This started with my tattoo.  Observing the creative process.  But it continues even more from watching my second son who will likely follow my oldest to the Baltimore School for the Arts but this time for visual arts rather than music.  Seeing what it takes.  Even occasionally giving it a try myself.  And realizing just how much effort is required.

(4) My appreciation of how much effort it takes to parent my kids.  I have done the single parent thing for a week at a time now and then when Sherry has had the opportunity to go on short vacations by herself.  However, over the past six weeks, I have spent a lot more time doing the single parent thing repeatedly while Sherry has taken Christopher (or in one case both Christopher and Kelsey) to audition at various colleges.  I really do appreciate what Sherry has to do.

(5) My self-expression.  When I began running again in 2006/7 I had not even journaled seriously in ages.  Now, I write all the time.  And I share.  And it relieves a lot of stress.  And my self-expression is not just writing.  The tattoo is a part of that as well.

(6) My search for answers.  Particularly in the past year with numerous sudden and unexpected passings.  And my search for answers in ways that combine what I do at work, what I teach in Sunday school, what I hear in church, and what I think about while I run.

Which brings me to say that I have a pretty amazing and complex life.  An interesting constructed reality in which things like the fact that I happened to run 6.4 miles could lead to an entire entry about things that I appreciate at least twice as much as I used to.   

40 Days to Better: Day 34

I normally write after I run.  This morning, for the second straight morning, I am waiting to see if my stomach calms down enough to run.  Don't know what has been going on with the GI system for the past two days.  Certainly hope I don't feel like this next Saturday on the morning of the Baltimore running festival.

In any case, there is a topic I have been thinking about all week.  Thinking back to the old song by The Police that includes the lines "If you love somebody" (over and over again) followed by "Set them free."  Whatever the context of this in the song sung by The Police, I am thinking of this in terms of a child.  I was inspired to think about this because of an issue in Sunday school that I had a long discussion with Sherry about afterwards and eventually asked the Director of Religious Education at my church to help me with.

A well meaning parent, in a family in which both parents had described their child as very shy, wanted to volunteer in my classroom.  So, on the third Sunday of this year's Sunday School program, this parent was in the classroom.  The child acted completely differently.  The child who had been a little antsy became very antsy.  The child who while not volunteering a lot had responded politely when asked questions suddenly didn't respond to me.

Was this the first time I had seen a child act completely differently around parents than not around parents?  No.  I've been at parenting long enough to have seen this in a variety of settings.  

But in this case it was clear that the parent needed to let the child "be free." At least of the parent.  At least for one hour on a Sunday morning.  To let the child just be the child.  To see how the child would behave.  To see what the child would take away from the experience.  To see what the progress the child will make.

I am no miracle worker as a Sunday school teacher.

I am not perfect as a Sunday school teacher.

I am sure that some parents would find my conversational style with the kids unusual.  Some parents probably expect Sunday school to be a lecture (one-to-many in at least some educators' language) rather than a discussion.  While I want to have a discussion.  I want the kids to be active.  I may even choose (if the seats are set up to help this) to sit with the kids rather than stand at the front of the room this week.  

Is there a bigger lesson here?  For parenting--for sure.  In any situation, I have to assess whether y guidance is too much.  Whether my efforts to seemingly help may actually hinder my child's development.

As a manager and leader--perhaps.  When I am micromanaging but should trust my staff to do their jobs?  

In running--there is something about micromanaging.  Last night I wrote about being too analytical.  Too control.  Rather than just following my heart and legs.  So, maybe there is even a lesson here for running.

Fascinating--as so much of what I have written about in these 40 days on the road to better has been about how lessons from running permeate the rest of my life.  Today, I have turned that on its head and taken a lesson from elsewhere and linked it back to running.  Funny how life works that way sometimes.  

40 Days to Better: Day 26

Today I ran 4 miles at just over an 8 minute per mile pace. After getting up and still having to wash some dishes, it was just nice to be able to go out and get in a little bit of time on the road.  And I always enjoy just getting out to clear my mind before a day at work.

As I ran this morning, I looked up and noticed that there were clouds in the sky.  We have had not many cloudy mornings recently so the clouds caught my attention.  And while it is only very early fall, I mentioned to my boys when we road in the car this morning (17 year old driving his two younger brothers to school and me to work so that the 17 year old could keep the car for the day) the old Mamas and Papas song California Dreaming.  "All the leaves are brown, and the sky is gray..."  When I mentioned the line from the song, my 17 year old commented on how depressing that sounded.

He was right.  I think it was intended to be a reminder of not so happy things.

And that brings me to my thought for the day.  This is not so much a real insight or something that I need to do on the road to better.  Instead, this is something that I realize I have to watch out for and avoid on the road to better.

Will there be gray days?  Sure.  Not just in the clouds in the sky but also in life.

Gray days in marriage.  But plenty of bright sunny days too.

Gray days at work.

Gray days in teaching classes. 

Gray days in friendships.

Gray days in parenting.

Some gray days of running--although I have been blessed to be in top form lately.

What do I need to avoid?  Every gray day?  No, certainly not.  Impossible to do in any case.

What I need to avoid is bringing the gray from one facet of my life into other areas.

A gray run should not lead to a gray day at work.

A gray day at work should not lead to a gray family evening.

A gray day in a friendship should not make the rest of my activities for the day gray.

Will there be some carry over?  Almost certainly.  Life works that way.  It is hard to shield any one area from all others.

What is possible is to make sure to shield as much as possible.

What is possible is to recognize when one area of my life is "gray" and needs to be kept under control.

What is possible is to do everything in my capacity to avoid bringing the problems of the day home with me.

We will see how good I can be at that as I move ahead on the road to better. 

40 Days to Better: Day 25

Today's run was my first on a treadmill in a while.  Despite the fact that many of my running friends don't like treadmill runs, I got a great workout this morning. I had a half mile warmup and then ran 10K at a 6:40 pace to finish in 41:20.  I believe that is my best ever.  It is a full minute faster than my best track.  And I did run with a slight up incline the whole time.  So, now a bad showing.  

Why did I take the treadmill option?  Well, it was a day when despite my surprising consistency on track runs lately (and my main alternative to the treadmill was a track 10K), I still felt the need for a very controlled experience.  And today that is exactly what I had.  I stayed at the 6:40 pace the whole time, except for a brief time when I sped it up one notch higher (to a 6:35 pace) to make the time even out to an average of 6:40. The treadmill provides the guidance for me and I can focus on my form, on how my legs were feeling, on my breathing, and on my cardio.  And, on how controlled I felt.  

So, it is using a mechanical device to provide guidance so I can focus on any number of other things that will also help me to improve.

So, thinking about how this related to the rest of life on my road to better, I come to another meeting I had with my leadership coach today at which she provided exactly that--guidance.  While this issues are specifically work related, it was a reminder to me that even with six months of leadership at the business school under my belt, I still have plenty of opportunities to learn more about the nuances of leadership.

An interesting side note is that my coach described me as "strangely excited" about the transition to administration when she first met me.  But she also chalked that up to my general optimism toward life.  While she was wondering all along, "Does he know what he is getting himself into?"  Well, I have come a long way.  I am making decisions that are much different and more informed and better than what I would have made six months ago.  I have benefitted from guidance from others.

And, now I am starting to provide the guidance.  Guiding decision making.  Guiding a new direct report who arrived yesterday and is beginning to feel her way around (who had to look in my office to determine where the "personality" is as she thinks of me as having a lot of personality--it turned out that she simply had not looked in the right place to see where all my personal "stuff" was to really understand the interesting things I bring).

And, of course, I have had lots of opportunity to receive guidance about running, guidance about marriage, guidance about education, guidance about parenting, and guidance about any number of others things in life recently and in the past.  So, I take my lesson in understanding the need for guidance in my running this morning, and think of it as a reminder to examine my actions and my needs and to determine where I need guidance and when to seek it in the rest of my life as well.  

Imagining Opportunity

I can't believe that it has been over three weeks since I have made an entry in this blog.  But I feel compelled to write.

The past month has been busy.  One reason has been a four week Coursera class that I managed.  That was one opportunity that has turned out to be a lot different than what I imagined, but it has been a great one nevertheless.  There is a lot to be taught and a lot to be learned from interacting with as many as 20,000 people in an online class in a four week time period.

The past month has also been busy with slightly longer FB entries as I have tried for the past three weeks to come up with something truly new to be thankful for.  Today, I wrote that I was thankful for my imagination.  I commented that imagining possibilites (or opportunities in the heading for this entry) is at least half of what is necessary to make them come true.

Certainly, without the ability to imagine new opportunities, I would need to rely on someone else to create them.  I have clearly benefitted over time from other people creating opportunities for me. And I am sure I will continue to do so.  But as my career matures, I have had to learn to imagine and create more opportunities for myself and to sometimes be the one who either creates opportunities for others or at least helps others to imagine opportunities they might bring to reality. .

There are also many times that I imagine things that will never come to pass.  Part of maturing is learning how to separate those that are likely to be a reality from those that are not more quickly and to pursue only those that are likely to become reality.

As a final thought this morning, I'll share a quick example of finding opportunity where none may have been apparent and creating what may be a new opportunity.  I have enjoyed the opportunity to mentor or at least share insights gained through years of personal and professional experience with many over time.  In addition to the standard mentoring of graduate advisees and sharing life lessons with younger runners, this has been largely facilitated by my undergraduate institution (Penn State) with numerous formal mentoring programs.  The last person I was formally linked with has now graduated from Penn State, although we stay in touch.  Of course, I remain open to other opportunities Penn State may create.

After a race last week, I reached out to someone I had watched and heard make a brief speech in the post-race ceremony.  The post-race ceremony was mostly about distracted driving issues. Why?  This was the Fourth Annual Heather Hurd 5K, organized in honor of a young woman with so much ahead of her who was taken from this world much too early in an accident caused by a distracted driver.  The topic of distracted driving had already led to one opportunity for mentorship of a master's student last year.

The race raises money for a book scholarship at Harford Community College.  The prior recipient was the one whose speech caught my attention as she mentioned what she is interested in studying and it is close enough to my own interests that afterwards I got in touch and offered to share insights on health promotion and public health as she plans the her early career around these topics.  Would I ever have thought when I left to race on a Saturday morning that I would come home with a new opportunity to give back professionally?  Probably not.  But part of imagining opportunities is being ready to imagine them at any time and in any place where they might present themselves.

Perhaps it will only be a single conversation with someone looking ahead to graduate school.  But I know from my own experience that even a single conversation can sometimes help to shape a person's outlook on professional life and the opportunities that life presents (in other words, the opportunities a person imagines).  Thus, regardless of whether there is just a single conversation or we stay in touch, sharing of professional insights and the issues of work/life balance has the potential to make a real difference in where a person turns next.

As I imagine possibilities ahead (in parenting, my profession, and my running) I'd like to close with some congratulations and a wish.  First, a public congratulations to the Hurd family for a great event.  Second, a public congratulations to the previous winner of the scholarship from money raised by the race.  I am sure that regardless of any insight I may provide you will have a great career ahead, although I hope that my insight may help.  And a public wish that my mentoring will help those who I am asked to mentor or have the serendipitous opportunity to mentor in the future.