Weird Dream

I don'f often have vivid dreams.  Last night I had one that running friends will realize the unlikelihood of it actually happening.  Makes me think about the "meaning" to the degree that dreams have meaning.  

I was at some international track and field competition running the anchor leg of a 4x400 relay.  (For my non-running friends on most tracks that is a run that is one lap for each runner.)  I got the baton with a big lead and managed to hang on for the victory against someone who was supposed to be very fast.  People I know from today including hockey parents were there to greet me at the finish where we went into a chant of "U-S-A! U-S-A!"

Yes, I still love my track workouts.  I always have.  And, I presume, I always will.  But I couldn't even make the 4x400 team for the Penn Relays in high school 28 years ago.  The 400 was never a great event for me.  The only event I was ever really even all that good at was the 1600 meeter run.  And I can't tell you why my brain would want to highlight a relay race for a distance shorter than I was ever any good at.

As I write this, I can throw something out there as an idea for interpreting my dream.  It did represent a win against the odds at a race I aspired to get into (everyone wanted to run at the Penn Relays back in the day).  And I needed some help from my fellow athletes to participate in the win--being give such a big lead.  So, perhaps it does go along with my current running goals.  Working with a little help from my friends toward a goal that many say is against all odds--the Comrades run next year.  Some 56 miles.  Completely the opposite end in terms of distance.  But needing help from my friends in what may be perhaps even more important ways--like the endless training miles.  Especially in a week in which I had just run with others four times in one week (with runs of four different paces at 7, 6, 5, and 1 miles) for the first time in a VERY long time.

What about the hockey parents?  Not entirely sure.  But we did watch our kids play a heck of a game yesterday.  Despite losing 7-2 they played a MUCH BETTER game against a team that had beaten them 9-0 in the opening game of the season.  And, among other things, they played together better as a team--again reflecting the importance of friends in achieving goals.

If anyone has any other ideas on what this might mean given my crazy connecting-the-dots mind, I'm open to suggestions.

My Annual Review and Look Ahead

Here were my goals for 2014…

(10) Run.  Do it a lot.  But keep it in its place.  Use it as a focal point.  Use it for goal setting.  Use it for friendship building.  Use it to seek meaning.  I’d say I handled this one quite well getting in 2222.2 miles PR’ing at 3 outdoor race distances, and ending my running year with a sub-19 5K on the treadmill. 

(9) Keep teaching Sunday School.  I did this for the spring semester.  But then it ran up against numbers (3) and (1).  I am still involved in ministry at my parish.  Just in a different way. 

(8) Keep writing.  Did it and look forward to continuing to do it.  All good.

(7) Find a place for music.  I have been listening to a lot of music—between my oldest son graduating from the School for the Arts with his horn and piano foci and his now being a student at a conservatory and then my 15 year old continuing to sing in the Maryland State Boychoir.  I have listened to a wider variety of music on Spotify and elsewhere—including a lot of country for the first time in my life (my apologies to anyone whose country interests I ever criticized before).  And I have begun to define better how music relates to my worship experience—I need to sing rather than to listen to really make my worship experience as powerful as it can be.    

(6) Bake more.  I am not sure that I managed this one.  This also came up against (3).  But I have certainly kept baking and worked on a few new things (like fancy pumpkin and banana breads).  And continued to work with my sons, especially my now ten year old, to teach them as well.

(5) Take more pictures.  I did some of this.  I am trying to make sure that I carry my cell when I run and then use it to tell stories better.  And I have also used pictures of some of the things that I have had shared with me (like five stones from my last MPH advisee) and gotten pictures of me with other runners that have helped to highlight my year. 

(4) While I have access to all types of electronic technologies, put them down more. I am not sure how well I did on this one.  I still use my devices a lot.   

(3) Recognize my limitations more.  Definitely recognizing that I have to say no to some things and I have to think about my limits more.  This has affected numerous other goals. 

(2) Structure my time better.  Certainly did this to some degree to achieve my running goals.  Certainly did this with family to achieve the goals of getting the kids to all their activities.  Got some more sleep too. 

(1)      Remember that family comes first.  Done. Must continue.  Have run fewer races.  Have gotten more sleep to try harder to stay awake through events.  Have traveled less so that I could help with kids getting places.  Have made this my number one priority.

Now to look ahead.  But I am going to make this year’s a little more objective and a little more measurable and I will review them once a quarter rather than just once a year. 

(10) Run at least four days a week.  I’m not going to try to run more miles than I did this year (2222.2).  I’m not even going to shoot for 2000 miles in 2015.  There will be years in the future for other mileage goals.  This year I’m mostly going to aim to keep up my three quality workouts a week and one with Back on My Feet.  I hope to use running as all that it was last year for friendship and writing.  No other goals—right now.  Then, I will plan to do some cross training and/or weight training as well to keep up my overall health.

(9) Bake at least one pizza/stromboli and one other bread or cranberry sauce each week.  (In addition to general meal prep that I do most of in our household.)  This will hone and continue to develop my skills in the kitchen.  It is something I love. 

(8) Do something with art at least once a week.  This could be as simple as a pencil sketch.  It could be a photograph that I somehow process.  It could be an artistically posed photograph.  It could be appreciating art more in the same way that I will work on appreciating music more. It could be thinking about art that I’d like others to work on.  I’ve got ideas for a second tattoo, but that might be a marriage-ending incident if I do that.  Although with the passing of Mark Pacione and the focus on living a little more in the moment because you never know when the end will come (Mark was a healthy 60), I’d settle for a simple tattoo at this point.  Of all the things that I have though about for my second (cornucopia, golden apples, loaves of bread, cassowary, and red egg) the red egg (associated with Mary Magdalene who is the patron saint of a contemplative life) really speaks to me most.  

(7) Continue to work on appreciating music more in my life.  This might mean finding time to play an instrument I’ve learned before.  Working more with my mandolin (Bleak Midwinter would be an excellent song to play on the mandolin—or learning the chord progressions for old Hooters songs).  Or just appreciating the performances more from a critical listening point of view.  Many ways I can achieve this.  Goal—once a week of some time spent with music more than just having it on in the background.

(6) Blog once a week in my personal blog and once a week in my professional blog.  Of course, if I can fit in more, all the better. 

(5) Finish Decoding Spirituality—a series of essays I have written and am stringing together as a book—about  the ways in which I have worked to find meaning in the numbers around me throughout my life and the insights this has given me about how others might find meaning.  (Don’t worry—the conclusion wont’ be that everyone should be as numbers centered as I am.) 

(4) Sleep at least six hours each night.  Of course, all the experts say 7 or 8.  I would love to get 7 or 8 every night but I don’t know how I can possibly do all the other things I want to do his year (while continuing to recognize limitations).  But I don’t want to have an abundance of 4-hour or 5-hour nights sleep nights.  The best thing I can do for this—track and have an accountability buddy for my sleep in the same way that I have found that have accountability buddies for exercise makes such a difference. 

(3) Tell people “thank you” not just at the big times (like thanking Jackie after my PR in Philly and Lauren after my two person marathon relay) but for little things.  After the passing of Mark Pacione and several others who have been lost in recent years starting with Gerry Paradiso back in 2010, I have realized just how important it is to communicate appreciation to people as often as possible.  It doesn’t have to be a big production every time.  Sometimes a hand-written thank you note.  Sometimes a hand-written and hand-designed thank you note.  Other times just a high-five or hug with a thank you at the end of a run.  Sometimes a quick “thanks for taking the kids on a day I couldn’t” at home in the evening.  But always living a life full of gratitude to the amazing people around me.

(2) Stay in touch with friends.  In the past year I had reason to reach out to many friends from elementary school as I remembered the importance of people who had known me for a long time after my son and the young woman he had been dating for more than 3 years left for college as “just friends.” That led me to think about the importance of people with whom I spent a lot of time early in my life.  People who have know me forever. I have also realized how important accountability friends (last year for running) are.  They help me focus and keep it real.

(1) Family must stay #1.  No matter how much I run.  No matter how hard I work.  No matter how much I write.  Family is always first.  If ever there comes a year when that is obviously not true, I must reassess.

Happy 2015!

Ten Meaningful Miles

This is today's answer to #WhatMakesYouSoar.

It is another Thursday night and I am sitting in the ice rink.  This has become a Thursday evening habit as my middle son skates during the free style session with the Baltimore Figure Skating Club.  It is a great time to chill out.  (No pun intended as I usually sit in the lobby rather than going into the rink.)  I chill after dinner.  I chill after a hard day at work.  And I get to chill after a hard workout.  The other habit during this marathon training season has been hard workouts on Thursday.  I have run a combination of track workouts and progression runs on Thursday.  This week was a progression run.  A ten mile progression run.  One that I had done well on but not executed exactly in my multiple attempts to do so.

The plan for today was to start at an 8:15/mile pace.  Then to speed up at each mile marker so that my pace would get faster by 0:15 per mile until reaching 7:15.  Hold the 7:15 for a second mile.  Then work my way down to a 6:30 before cooling down with an 8:00.  And I planned to meet a training partner who had paced the Marine Corps Marathon this past weekend. She was going to help me keep up the pace, despite what she had more or less just run.

So, I left early enough to put gas in my car and be at the Dunbar track in downtown Baltimore shortly after 5:15.  The officer had already opened the gate, so I knew we would be able to use the track later in our workout  My partner arrived shortly after that and we began our run just after 5:20.  I was in shorts and a t-shirt.  She was in longer running tights and a thin long-sleeved layer.  We each know what to expect of our bodies when it is about 45 degrees.  (At least that is what my Garmin report told me the starting temperature was.)  

We planned to run on a course that we had run nine days earlier.  On that day we had run 7 miles.  a 6.5 mile course on the streets of Baltimore followed by a half mile on the track.  Today we were going to go 14 laps or 3.5 miles on the track.  So, not all 40 laps or 10 miles, but a lot more than the 0.5.  That was fine.  We headed north along Ensor, turned left to go west on Madison, and chatted.  It had been about nine days since the last time we had run together with another partner.  So we had things to catch up on including running plans, work, and her experience at the Philadelphia Back on My Feet Bash and the Marine Corps Marathon.  As we headed past the prison facilities on Madison and then turned south on Fallsway we were at a comfortable pace.  We hit mile 1 just about at St Vincent de Paul church at President and Fayette with an 8:04.  Nice start.  A little fast but not crazy.

So, we had to pull up at Fayette for traffic, the continued down President Street, hung a left on Baltimore St, south on Exeter, and west on Aliceanna.  Always love the smell of the H&S Bakery, especially on cool, pre-dawn mornings.  Second mile--7:38.  A little overzealous so we decided to be careful on the third mile.  

We continued onto Boston Street.  Chugging along the street by the harbor.  Not too many runners or others on the street that morning, but what seemed like lots of cars.  Third mile 7:45.  Right on target.

As we headed into mile 4, we turned up Ellwood.  We reached a point at which we were not talking that much.  It was time for the hard work to begin.  Ellwood crests before the south side of Patterson Park.  I do know that one comment during mile 4 was the observation that mile 5 would involve the run uphill on Baltimore Street.  That was yet to come.  Mile 4 was run in 7:22--8 seconds below the target but not out of control.

We picked it up as we ran downhill a bit to Baltimore Street and turned west to run along the north side of Patterson Park.  The climb really begins at Linwood.  We have run this a lot of times.  Today, we ran it in 7:12 as we reached Patterson Park Avenue.  Doing pretty well.

As we moved into mile 6--the last one that would be completely on the road, began by finishing going up on Baltimore Street, then headed down toward Central Ave.  The mile did not end until we had turned north and headed across Fayette and toward Orleans.  We had to stop at traffic lights a couple times.  The downhill added speed and we ran a 7:04.

We continued north on Central and turned left on Monument to run along the south side of the Dunbar High School athletic facilities outside the iron fence.  We went back up along Ensor to the entrance to the entrance to the track and ran just under 2 laps on the track.  As we had entered the track area, we were running a 7:08/mile pace.  Over the course of the two laps we sped up a little at a time and pulled some time off the pace.  As we reached the near end of the bench (in the direction you run) on the north side of the track, we found we had run a 7:01.  That was the first time we had a "slow" mile but it was slow only by 1 second.  So, no stressing over that one.

We had been running side by side throughout.  During mile 8 an ever so slight gap opened up.  We train with partners to benefit from each other.  But we also train with partners who understand when we need to meet a goal.  My watch signaled the end of mile 8 slightly before I returned to exactly four laps from where I'd begun.  So, I hit the lap button again when I reached the exact lap point, and when I added up the times later had a 6:45. Right on schedule.  Now was the real test.  I had never gotten much lower than this all summer and fall thus far, except on a treadmill.  No treadmill today.  Just the need to keep pushing.

So, with four laps at pace, I picked it up some more.  Each lap went by easily.  I don't know where all the energy came from.  But I watched the average mile time go down.  My watched beeped at a 6:20 but that was a little early.  I was running faster than in mile 8, but even if it had taken me the same nine seconds extra as in the eighth mile, I would have still run a 6:30.  That was a crowning achievement in my marathon preparation.  

Final mile at what seemed like a really slow pace was still below 8:00.  The total time was 1:13:09.  That is exactly the same time in which I ran my first 10 mile race back in June 2011.  What a long way I have come.  

So, I had finally executed a progression run with the goal of finishing at a 6:30 not on a treadmill at the proper time.  That combined with my excellent 22 miler 12 days earlier really gives me a shot of confidence about the Philadelphia Marathon in 24 days that I didn't have before.  

My training partner is quite confident I can run a sub-3:10.  The person who developed my training plan says maybe even 3:07ish.  Either would be amazing.  But I take nothing for granted.

I have to earn a marathon finish.  I have to earn an PR--even just running a 3:14:24.  I have to earn that 7:20 pace (an improvement to 3:12-something.)  I have to earn the 3:10.  And I would have to earn the 3:07.  These will be earned (or not) on race day. But they are also earned every day when I take a series of steps on the road or on the track or on a treadmill.  They are earned by missing some sleep and awakening at crazy hours and sacrificing other things that could be done.  They are earned through focus, strength, ambition, perseverance, and love.  They are earned by being me.

And if I complete it will show, once again, that I can complete something I begin.

I am looking forward to this marathon more than I ever would have imagined.

I am now at 1864.3 miles.  Somewhere on County Road A020 in Corona, NM.    

Work with Your Body Toward Renewal and Leaving Behind Arbitrary Goals

Today's entry will be a complex weaving of several threads.  

First, I ran a 10x400 workout this morning.  I had hoped to get down to Dunbar.  Instead, I ran at Gilman.  About 2.3 miles before my first 400.  Then ten 400's with 8 of 10 at 1:26 and one of the other two two seconds faster and the other one two seconds slower.  Why I had variation in #3 and #4 but otherwise just ran consistently, I'll never know.  Interesting to do it all alone.  Interesting to do it without being able to see splits for the early ones--too dark and light not working.  But I was glad to have a fully lap-functioning watch.  Comment about working with my body?  How I described today's workout.  With a goal of breaking 19:00 at a 5K on Memorial Day weekend, I don't have to run super fast.  In fact, running super fast right now would just do one thing--increase the probability of injury.  What I need to do is to train my body at a speed that will feel fast but under control.  That is what I ran today.  Ten 400's that were under control.  I could tell my body was doing work.  But it wasn't fighting for survival.  It wasn't going all out.  It was just working.  Working with my body makes me think of two other things.  One, Sherry's experience with childbirth and our taking Bradley instead of Lamaze classes. The emphasis is working with your body.  It reminds me of getting a therapeutic massage or my tattoo.  In each case, I just let my "self" go and trusted the person working with me to do what I needed/asked for.  Release.  Trust.  Harmony.  It even makes me think of Waldorf education and how it is intended to be tied to the child's developmental phases.  

Second thing today.  This puts me at about 649.9 miles.  That puts me on Terra Haut Rd headed out of Worthington, Indiana.  Continuing through the midwest.

Third thing today.  With Easter, I changed my profile picture on Facebook, my picture on the Connecting the Dots page on Facebook, and my cover photo on Facebook.  Here are the three pictures.  Fun.  Symbols of new life and family.  Good theme with the resurrection.  Fr. Sam made a comment about Easter not being one day for a lifetime of searching ways to find new life--with Jesus, of course, in this context.

Two other things.  I said that my last entry was going to be the last about Boston.  Alas, I was wrong.

What else got my attention today?  First, a story about Ryan Hall.  If the story is true, this is the stuff that a book or movie will be made of some day.  And it is the stuff that can bring a tear to the eye of someone who has ever truly experienced "team".  The story says that the fastest US marathon runner in history used his leadership and held the American runners other than Meb back.  Why?  So that the non-US runners would not have "help" in catching up to Meb.  This is an amazing self-sacrifice to get an American to win the race.  It shows strategy.  It shows teamwork.  It shows caring about the bigger picture goal.  It shows not putting one's own needs first.  It reminds me of the best 1600m I ever ran.  I was with a bunch of guys who just hung around at a comfortable (back in the day) 70 second per mile pace.  I just hung in.  I rode the wave to my best time.  If I had pushed, I'm sure that they other guys would have pushed and left me in the dust as happened the next day.  Running is a very mental and tactical sport on some days.  Yesterday was one.  And it brought an incredible victory for American running.

Finally, a post in the New York times that a fellow health economist and runner posted a link to.  It was about marathon running and bad investments.  It noted how marathon runners focus on running arbitrary distances--why 26.2 miles? or even why 5K?--at arbitrary times--why break 4:00:00?  At least some runners get satisfaction from coming in under rather than over that arbitrary time.  Of course, I am sometimes guilty.  Aiming for a 19:00 5K.  Having to run a 3:15:00 marathon to qualify for Boston.  But then I assessed my last three marathons: 3:15:45/3:14:25/3:15:56.  By the criteria of what was just over or just under a target time, two of these would be considered complete failures.  And yet, I don't see them that way.  I do describe the 3:15:45 as heart-breaking most times when I talk about it.  But I also describe it as exhilarating as it was the first time I'd broken 3:20 and was more than a six minute improvement over a race I'd run six weeks earlier.  The article in the NYT talked about making sure to keep track of long term goals rather than having arbitrary short-term goals in investing.  When all is said and done, while there will always be those somewhat arbitrary target times as long as I run, I realize what I have done to cope with missing them as often as not.  I have reset my expectations.  I look for lessons in whatever the outcome of the race.  If I come in just under a target time--bonus!  But in general, the goal is simple. Run.  Enjoy.  Learn.

To conclude that brings me back to my friend Lauren.  As a running mentor, if there is one thing that I would hope I could teach her about life and running, it is to avoid the arbitrary goals that society or our shared sport or ourselves place on what we do.  To take the good with the bad.  To live it all.  To truly experience it all.  And to learn from it all as we go along.  Happiness is in the learning.  Living is in the learning.  I think that she has actually learned much of this in her young 22 years.  But there is always room for learning and reminders.  

And, as on so many days, the last couple have brought a lot of lessons I shall reflect on by and by.  And wonder, why I am so lucky to have them.

Multitasking

So, Thursdays run (I'm still a little behind) was a nice run.  I met my last MPH advisee downtown at Our Daily Bread/Christopher's Place where I still occasionally meet up with the Back on My Feet team to run.  My advisee is someone whom I know because of Back on My Feet.  It is not typical to meet advisees at 5:30 in the morning, but since my advisee is actually a better runner than I am, a run from Our Daily Bread to the traffic circle in Harbor East, around the promenade, to the Under Armour offices and back for a nice 7.9 was a great way to carry on a conversation about her future as she approaches finishing her MPH capstone.

7.9 miles from my last location takes me from the western edge of Cambridge, OH, past New Concord, Ohio.  No Catholic churches along the 7.9 mile stretch us US 22/US 40 that runs from Cambridge to where I am now on my virtual pilgrimage.  Instead, if I were actually running along I would just be enjoying the way between small towns in southern Ohio.

My advisee and I talked about her future for most of the run.  It was cold but each of us was dressed with enough layers to be comfortable and despite spending a good bit of the run on the promenade by the Harbor there was no appreciable wind.

At the end, we were discussing how much effort it takes to get psyched up for each run.  I answered that it doesn't take much effort for me.  There are particular workouts--a really challenging tempo run or a really challenging track workout or a very hot (or very cold) long distance run. Any of these might take some extra effort.  In contrast, my advisee commented that she often has to work on getting herself psyched for a workout.  It is interesting because she has historically been a better runner than I am.  Better PR's at most if not all distances.  But, despite being more than a decade my junior, she also has run more than I have.  Or run for more years continuously than I have.  So maybe, it is something that a person doesn't look forward to quite as much or in the same way.  

I realized that running is so much more than just a workout for me.  It is social--thus the multitasking advisor-advisee 7.9 mile run at 5:30 AM.  It is spiritual--tied to how I think about my relationship with something bigger and how spending time while running thinking about what those bigger things might be.  There are goals--ever since completing my first half marathon that I had to register for back in 2009, I have not gone more than 6 months without some type of race.  This year, running is part of an overall structured experience for the year--my virtual pilgrimage. That is both spiritual and creative.  I write.  I tie things together.  I connect the dots.  

So, on Thursday specifically I was multitasking and running serves a multitasking purpose in my life in general at this time.   

When Do I Need Help?

Today I made an interesting observation to a colleague.  I commented that when I had gone from being an associate professor to a full professor, I had felt that I actually needed more mentoring as a full professor.  When I was an associate professor the goal was clear--get the publications I need (and do whatever it takes) to be full.  Once I became full, the next step was not as clear.

In a similar vein, in my position now, the first six months were characterized by just getting information.  Learning.  Accepting.  Understanding.  Taking things in.  As I move forward my goals are much less clear.  Now that I have settled in and put out the first few fires, what do I want to do strategically.  What is the path I want to set?  What really matters?

Those questions are much harder to answer.  It is ironic that sometimes (to quote just the title of a book that was recommended to me by my leadership coach) what got you here won't get you there.  In other words, I need to find new skills and come up with new decision making processes to get to the next level.  (Perhaps a bit like Candy Crush?)

And there comes a point where others will be useful sounding boards, but I will really not have a coach or mentor.  I will simply have people around me who join with me in trying to achieve and who care about my success.  Some will just be sounding boards.  Some will be colleagues with whom I collaborate.  

We will see where this all goes. 

What Does the Term Recreational Running Really Mean?

A bit of time ago a running friend of mine suggested that after the latest injury this person had suffered, the future might only hold recreational running.  I thought this was an interesting concept--what is recreational running compared with any other type of running.

So, I went to dictionary-dot-com and looked up recreational.  Of course, it reads something like "of or having to do with recreation."  So, I look up recreation and we find that it has to do with something yielding relaxation and enjoyment.

By that definition, I'm a recreational runner.

Do I have goals?  Yes, but that doesn't make it any less relaxing or enjoyable.

Do I sometimes run pretty hard?  Sure, but that doesn't mean it is not enjoyable and it is still a way to relax some parts of my life.

Do I race and intend to continue racing?  Sure--still enjoyable.

If I was told I had to run slower or less frequently would that change any of this?  As long as I could run injury-free, I think that the answer is no.  I would still find it relaxing and enjoyable.

An injury could make it not so relaxing or enjoyable.  But if I were injured and could return from the injury at any level of running, I would still find it fulfilling and I would adjust my goals.  Disappointed--sure.  But I don't see much difference in whether it would be recreational or not.

One other thing that I recognize is how much the recreation (enjoyability and relaxation) does require at least a little diversification compared with what I had been doing for quite some time.  I enjoy having a core set of runners with whom I work out.  A core set who can push me to run my strongest--as that is such an important component of what makes running enjoyable for me.

But over the past two weekends, I have run distances (3.5 miles in one case and 18 in another) with individuals with whom I either had not run anything close to that before or at least had not run with for a couple years.  

What that has led me to realize is how much diversification can help.  Different speeds.  Different styles.  Different goals.  Different perspectives.  Different stories to share.  Each of those adds to the value in terms of relaxation and enjoyment.  

One friend I passed this morning pointed out how "late" (it wasn't even 8:30 yet when we passed) it was for me.  Yes, I will have to adjust my running once the fall arrives as my youngest will have ice hockey and I teach Sunday school at 9:15.  That is true.

However, the more people I can choose from to run with, the easier it will be to find someone with whom to go on a run at any start time (at least in the AM) on any day.  And enjoy all the stories, perspectives, styles, and paces that may come my way.

And if I look around, I have several groups to link with.  Some more formally than others.  Some more frequently than others.  And some that I have been in touch with more recently than others.  But when all is said and done, I have a wide variety of individuals with whom I can run a wide variety of distances with different goals in mind.

That is one of the other beauties of what running means for me right now.  Since I have achieved most of the "big" goals (getting to Boston and running it), I now am not "goal-less" but sort of in between as I wait to determine what my next "big goal" if any should be. I can always run faster.  I can continue to improve. Or I can just continue to use running as a creative and exciting way to have an excuse to eat the bread and cheese I love, to make friends, to keep my cardio in health check, and to clear my mind.

I just hope the people I run with feel the same.