Center It!

Two short words that are often shouted at my son's hockey game: "Center it!"  This is in reference to what to do with the puck from the side of the net to get the best shot.  On this particular weekend, it was also what I thought about as I prepared for the 5:30 Mass at St. Pius X.  When I was praying before mass, I thought that I should center my thoughts.

And then during the homily, Fr. Sam helped me to center my thoughts even more.  Specifically, he challenged the congregation to give some thought to death.  It was All Souls Day after all.  He lamented the diminution of the importance of All Souls Day in the American Catholic Church.  He linked this with the fear or saying anything about death.  Then he commented on how death could be "beautiful" like a child dying from something that just leads to tiredness before overcoming the indivdual and the child looks angelic as she dies to horrible deaths from Ebola or starvation or war.  

It got me thinking.  I've written about death before.  Whether I would be read.  Whether I think there is anything left undone.  What I would want to happen to me after.  What I would want the music to be at a memorial service mass.  

Do I have any idea how it would actually affect or impact me?  Of course not.  But I already have some idea of what people might say.  The things that I already see as part of my legacy are things that I hope would come out.  And inspire others.  And show how I lived.  And show that having a center can be an important part of a well-lived live in which one is loved, one gives love, and one feels fulfilled.  

"Center it!"  Not just running--but on the joy of giving.  

For the record, I did run 7.1 miles this morning and now find myself at 1895 on the year.  Just 105 miles to go to reach the original destination of my pilgrimage. 

40 Days to Better: Day 3

As we move around the picture to the left today we are on image three (the tattoo) and the idea of something borrowed.  I felt like I was running on borrowed time this morning as I did not leave until after 6:10--a rarity for me.  On day 3, I ran just 4.1 miles at around a 7:38 pace.  Nothing major.  Just a nice way to stretch out my legs a bit on the first truly cool morning in a while.  And while I ran the first mile in the 8:20's, I was feeling good enough and relaxed enough to open up for the last three.  Goal tomorrow is a tempo out on the streets from 5-6.  We'll see.

As far as the image goes, the tattoo is not borrowed.  It is on my leg forever.  The artwork is original.  However, the idea for a modern reinterpretation of an ancient story (akin to Godspell in relationship to the Gospel) was borrowed.  My artist borrowed ideas from different books.  In each case, we changed things a bit--so it is not completely like borrowing and returning in the same condition. It is more like borrowing and making something your own before sharing it back with the world.  An interesting form of borrowing.  This makes me think of the fictional mockingjays from The Hunger Games.  They were described as mimicking a sound but then change it to make it their own.

In any case, the thing that I have borrowed a lot of this summer is other people's time.  Friends' time.  The time of friends who could help me think through a bunch of things about career, about running, about what my life is centered around, and about what my life ought to be centered around.

And, of all the things (mostly ideas) I have borrowed in the past year it is the notion of what my life ought to be centered around that is most important--marriage and family--then running and work.  I won't say what order for running and work--but neither should ever eclipse marriage and family.

And while I borrowed friends' time and ideas about marriage, marriage is not borrowing.  My wife's promise was a gift to me.  Not something to be borrowed and returned.  Not something to do with as I wish.  But something to cherish every day and value every day.  Also, of course my promise to her was also a gift freely given.  Not something that I lent her for a time and would ever take back.

Still, marriage has led to a lot of borrowing of ideas (Christmas and Easter traditions are good examples).  But that is where "borrowing" ends.  Despite the fact that the "something borrowed" continues my use of the traditional marriage expression, this summer I have learned once again that marriage involves a full commitment and a gift rather than a lending or borrowing with the expectation of getting something or giving something back.  The goal of day three of forty days to being better will be to take that message with me--unconditional giving forever--always into my future with Sherry and never to forget.

Last Few Thoughts on Friends' Wedding

A few final thoughts on my friends' wedding last weekend...

First, during the procession into the church, it was very touching to see the groom pushing his father's wheelchair into the church.  I had not known that the groom's father was in a wheel chair.  Anyone in the groom's family could have wheeled his father in.  But it was yes another sign of the giving of self and completely being there for others and not focusing only on one's own needs even on the wedding day.

Second, the couple has asked two of their guests to read the prayers of the faithful.  In asking for a prayer for a particular set of individuals, one reader become incredibly emotional.  Obviously even being asked to read this particular set of names was a big deal, although I did not know what the connection was.  The other person who had been asked stepped up and took over reading the rest of the intentions.  A sign of being there for another without question.

Third, at the receipt of the Eucharist in the Catholic church, for years there has been a practice of having individuals other than the priest helping to distribute Eucharist.  I have never been to a Catholic wedding mass at which the bride and groom assisted in the distribution of the Eucharist--in this case the wine that is the Blood of Christ.  Another sign of giving themselves and connecting with the congregation of guests.

Fourth, the bride after the Eucharist played Pachabel's Canon in D on piano in a duet with the violin player.  I was amazed that she could do this.  This was a great example of putting all of herself (and a talent I was unaware she had) into the experience of her wedding.

Finally, the table at which I sat was a table dominated by people tied to Back on My Feet.  An organization that both the bride and groom have participated in and which the bride has helped to make a huge difference in Baltimore.  An organization of individuals who give of themselves to lift the lives of others.

So, in summary, a wedding day that began with bringing together a large group to celebrate an aspect of life giving experience (running and meeting others), with a mass whose readings made me think of humility, perseverance and being open to the grace of God, with music that was uplifting and focused on humility and justice while representing the diversity of musical heritage in the Catholic church, with other acts of being there for others and giving of self throughout.