Running Isn't All There Is

Yesterday, I ran 13.9 miles.  I was supposed to run 14 but I hit 13.9 as I ran by my house, and I just didn’t feel the need to do another 0.1 yesterday.  Much last last weekend, I wasn’t feeling it.  I wouldn’t say, “Felt like crap”.  (Although if I had run another 6 miles maybe I would have.)  Instead, it just was not an inspired 14.

But that is okay.  Not every 14 has to be an inspired 14.

And if I look at the crazy week I have had, it is probably not so bad.

First, I had the trip to Ireland to sit on a dissertation final defense in which I left work around 1:45 on Tuesday, was on a plane to Boston at 4:05 for a connecting flight to Dublin.  Arrived in Ireland slightly before 8 AM on Wednesday morning.  Had a nice breakfast with a colleague and then was the external examiner for the defense which ended around 12:30.  Had lunch at a south Asian place in Dublin.  Then went back to the airport and was on a plane by 4:15 to return to the US.  I was home and getting ready for bed around 10:10 my own time. 

Went to work on Thursday.  Made it through a day that included a 9 mile track workout on the treadmill (uncooperative mother nature) and dinner at my boss’s house.  Had a personnel issue that rocked that day.

Then Friday was also a long day at work (personnel issues mostly resolved).  And I had to be up really early for the 13.9 mile run this morning.  When I hit the six mile mark and saw my pace and then flipped through to see the actual time, it was only 5:01 (AM!).  

Life lesson—there are only so many hours and sometimes only so many things can fit in.  Especially fit in and do well.  

Hope—while I don’t often take inspiration from Jimmy Buffet songs, “come Monday, it’ll be alright.”  (And I'm looking forward to Monday as today is an off day for running.)  

Regardless—13.9 miles at an 8:10 pace is not bad.  I have not missed significantly on any speed work.  I have missed two weekends in a row on long runs.

We will see what this all leads to.  As I said last weekend—all this work is really about one thing—minimizing the chance that I will not succeed at my goal of a PR marathon time.  But all I can do is minimize it. Life brings no guarantees.  

Other realization which I am coming to more and more as I talk with people about this fall’s Philly marathon—for the foreseeable future, this will be the last time I train this hard.  I can keep running the 5K’s and 10K’s.  I can run halves and even fulls.  But training myself to where I’m accumulating 60 miles a week to really improve my time has gotta be put on the back burner for a while. Maybe forever.

As for my virtual piligrimage, total—1638.  Still working my wife to Truth or Consequences.  Still on US 54. 

As for more than running, yesterday after the run I had the opportunity to go to a faculty summit for the business school and then attend the wedding of a cousin on my dad’s side.  All good.  Nice to be with family.  Even if the amount of my dad’s side of the family was quite small when all was said and done.  Best thing was a picture of the five men who are blood related in two generations on that side.  It was a nice shot.  And thinking about the life stories of the five men in this picture, it speaks worlds about the variety of experiences that we can have, the ways to raise kids, and the ways that we can make it in a satisfying life.  

Sweet and Salty and Other Ponderings While On the Treadmill for a Long Time

Last night, I ran 12.5 miles on the treadmill at the Y.  Had I envisioned that type of run for this week?  Short answer--no, I had not.  That is okay, however.  I have had to come to grips with the fact that with a very busy job there will be times when I am up late at night.  And when I have to be completely "on" the next morning at work, I better get the right amount of sleep.  Sometimes that, in turn, messes up my ability to run the distance I want.  Life goes on.  Yesterday I didn't get to run in the morning.  This morning I have an 8 AM meeting.  With that combination and a long 4H meeting for the kids last night, I came home, was surprised that the kids had not made dinner, helped them to make dinner, and then went to the Y.  I arrived around 7:30 and watched a gameshow on the screen while running the first half hour.  My body was confused by 12.2 miles on the treadmill.  And my body was confused by the evening run after a lot of food during the day.  I can't tell you when the last time was that I had to stop a workout to take a bathroom break.  It has been a while.  So, I ran 7 miles.  Restarted the machine because the timer only goes out to an hour and I was at 56 minutes.  Ran 1 mile.  Took a break.  And then ran 4.5 more.  Was thinking it would have been nice to get in 14 but I'm not complaining.  Even without the Boston Marathon this year, I am only 6 miles behind where I was at this time last year.

And where does this run put me in total?  Well, at 406 miles, I am now on Ohio state route 104, proceeding south from Ohio state route 316 and headed away from Columbus.  I am 3 miles south of the intersection of those two roads.  Next major destination--Cincinnati.

In any case, what else did I think about last night.  I have not written about Bible verses and running in a while. I have been more pre-occupied with what churches I am passing rather than Bible verses.  It was interesting having recently read The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and seeing the use of numbers and Bible verses.  Obviously the story line had much more sinister overtones than my use.  But the fascination in a fictional story surprised me.

When I got done last night I hopped on the scale and was down to just 157.  That is a major accomplishment and I think I am ready to head for a solid 150.  

However, I came home and probably ate and drank enough to put me back near 160 again.

What was interesting was the combination of what I ate and drank.  The sweet and salty in the title of this entry comes from what I had.  While I had made orzo and peas with Italian sausage (it is a simple mixture of orzo, peas, and Alfredo sauce--the sausage was served on the side), I didn't feel like having that for dinner.  So, I whipped up a smoothie of ice, cream of coconut, vanilla almond milk, dark chocolate cocoa, a banana, and whey powder.  That gave me the combination of protein, anti-oxidants, and a lot of calories.  When I started consuming it, I realized I was craving salt.  So I ate a bunch of hard pretzels.  And before I was done eating last night I snacked a bit on some chocolate crispy rice cereal.  It was not a combination I would necessarily recommend, but it satisfied what I was craving.  I realized I probably should have had a drink with electrolytes rather than just water while I was running as I sweated off A LOT last night.  But the desire for something salty that was not overly complex in terms of flavor was useful for me to recognize.  After all the time I have spent running, I have become better at recognizing what my body really needs even if it is not always the inherently healthiest combination.  I was satisfied but not stuffed when I was done.  And that was fine.  

As with many other examples in my life, it is interesting to think of the sweet and salty contrast.  Not quite a chocolate with caramel and sea salt--but a nice combination.  Pushing in different directions.  Needing balance.  How many other things in my work life and personal life are like that?  A lot.

Moving ahead, I can certainly plan better for my eating and drinking after runs to maximize the value of the exercise and the health effects on my body.  But I don't mind every once in a while just figuring out what I can find and taking advantage of it.     

The Spirituality of Advent, Day 6, Week 3

I had my third day in a row without running.  I can't say when the last time was that I had two weeks in a row like that, but there are things that just have to take priority right now.  But I will run the next four and then take Christmas Day off so all will be well.  And I hope to get nearly 40 in those 4 days.

In any case, I haven't had a whole lot of time to think about running and spirituality as a result.

So, where does that leave my thinking?  Well, it leaves (or sends) hy thinking in a couple of directions.

First, I do know that tomorrow morning will be a chance to catch up with the person I train with for the first time in two weeks and she has had some stresses.  It is always nice to run with a friend and get stressful stuff off your mind.  Running is much cheaper than therapy and fits into the larger picture of an integrated healthful life.

Second, I wanted to make a long overdue comment about the Peabody Youth Wind Orchestra playing selections from Les Mis.  I still get chills up my spine when I hear I Dreamed a Dream and On My Own.  No exception last weekend.  Learning the music.  Appreciating the story.  Feeling what the music can mean all tap into something that goes beyond simple logic.

Third, I made it to see my third grader play the xylophone today in his class's performance of the nativity play in Spanish. It was so cool and he was so excited.  He is finally realizing that his actions fit into something bigger and lay the groundwork for bigger things in his own life.

Fourth, Sherry and I enjoyed an evening downtown with two of our three boys at a German Christmas Village.  While it was not very German it was a lot of fun.  And despite the fact that we had an invitation to a party this evening, the time spent as family was more important.  I had spent so little time with my family earlier this week with the crazy travel schedule I had.  

So, today is just a recounting of a lot of little things.  But each little thing is important in leading to a balanced spiritual life.  

40 Days to Better: Day 1

There is a phrase that many people still recite in preparing for a wedding: something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.  I obviously had my own wedding many years ago.  And I don't expect any of my children to be having a wedding for many years from now.  But the phrase range true for me as I thought about what today means in terms of my first day of trying to be "better" over the 40 Days between yesterday and the Baltimore Running Festival Half Marathon.  The picture to the right shows something old (my last pair of Brooks Ghost 5 shows with the tread worn from 649 miles of running including this year's fateful Boston Marathon), my new running shoes (Brooks Ghost 6's--pair #1 with brand new treads), my tattoo (with its many borrowed scenes and themes), and something blue (circling back around to the Brooks 5's).   I actually think that the folk saying for weddings gives me a lot to think about over the next few days in terms of being better.  

For Day 1, let's begin with the easy thing--for the running--I was on the treadmill for two hours this morning--running a constant and flat 8 minute mile.  I know that some of my running friends would probably consider this to be a fate worse than death.  However, it allowed me to be sure of having access to a bathroom (although I didn't end up needing one), to monitor my water intake (I did drink more than 20 ounces that I could carry on my belt), and to not think too hard.  

Now, for Day 1, let's work on some of the more challenging themes. Let's begin with something old.  

The shoes are old.  Runners tend to get attached to their shoes.  I find that I (and at least some of my running friends) get even more attached to their shoes when they are used for a notable race.  I've turned most of my old running shoes into walking shoes until they deteriorate.  I am trying to think of what else I might do with this pair.  I don't have any really good ideas but I am thinking.  

However, it is interesting to think about why we get attached to the shoes.  Do the shoes really make a difference in how we run?  To paraphrase a book I am reading on personal success called "What Got You Here Won't Get You There," am I successful at running because of the shoes I wear or (as one friend might have me believe) despite the shoes I wear.  Should I stick with something because it isn't broken?  Or should I try something new because it might be even better?  What are the risks of trying something new?  Injury?  Not running as fast?  How soon would I know?  How long would it take to figure out?  What would be the consequences if I guess wrong?  Why is letting go emotionally and intellectually challenging?  

And how does this carry over into the rest of my life?  Are there work habits that are hard to let go even though trying something new might be better?

Are there parenting habits that kind of-sort of work but that another approach might be better?

Are there things about marriage that I could improve but might be scared to try anything different because what I am doing is at least sort of working?

I could go on with a list of other things.  But they all come back to the same question--why is it hard to let go, what is to be lost if I try something new, and how much might there be to gain?

I don't remember what I thought of the tradition of something old when I got married--in terms of the meaning it held.  If I were giving advice now, I would say that it has to do with the timelessness of marriage (at least as it is intended, that you can bring something old forward with you) but also a sign of letting go and moving on from things in the past and starting anew.  Have the something old, but be willing to leave it--no matter how strongly it pulls--after the wedding so that things can be fresh and new.

My running shoes show one thing--I do appreciate the timelessness of a good run, I still have a hard time letting go of things in the past that might be better left in the past, and I am not one to take many risks with trying new things (at least in some areas of my life).  What will help to make me better after these 40 Days is grappling with the questions that arise--how can I carry the timelessness to other parts of my life, how can I learn to let go when necessary, and when is it a good thing to take risks.  I certainly have in the past year (like the new job and a renewed focus on family--although the latter is only a risk to my career which should be second anyway), but I don't always.  

A lot of the answer is balance.  Always has been and always will be.

But part of the struggle over the remainder of the 40 days and the remainder of my life is how to achieve that balance and how it shifts over time. 

Work-Life Balance

Usually when people talk about work-life balance, they are talking about the need to make sure that work does not interfere with the rest of your life outside the office and vice-versa.  Today, I want to address a different type of work-life balance.  Balancing the lessons I learn in one with the needs I have in the other.

What exactly do I mean?  During the leadership coaching that I received between the time just before I officially started my new job full time on April 1 and earlier this month, my coach provided me with a lot of food for thought.  In so many ways, things about communication, figuring out what is important, and relationship building are key both in the workplace (for which she was coaching me) and at home for which I can often use some help.  My leadership coach didn't necessarily give me things to read or think about that everyone would see as applying to the rest of life as well as to work, but I always was looking for connections.  And finding them.

Today, I began reading yet another book this colleague had recommended.  This book is called, "What Got You Here Won't Get You There".  It is a book about behavioral issues that people have that may actually have helped them earlier in their careers as they advanced but that actually hinder them from moving forward any further.  And this time, I didn't even need to look for connections.  Instead, the book came right out and said that the same behaviors can be problems at home.

Overcommitment has been, is, and will likely (to some degree although I hope less) be one of these issues.  I think that my oldest inherited this tendency a bit.  However, during the course of this summer I have witnessed him pulling back from two things that lead me to believe there may be hope for him.

I have mentioned it before, but the intertwining of work and the rest of life is something I find fascinating.  

Connecting the Dots & Nourishing Souls--writ large

Yesterday while I was out for my "second" run of the morning, I had the good fortune of meeting up with a colleague of many years whom I don't often get to see these days.  I put my "second" run in quotes as I began the day with a slow jog with my eight year old--3 miles.  I then went back out for a much faster four mile run of my own before getting on with other activities.  On the second run as I was running up Charles St, north of Northern Parkway, I saw someone whom I did not immediately recognize turn from a side street onto Charles.  As I caught up and passed, I gave a clear "good morning" to the other runner, as I would to almost any runner I was passing at a fairly faster speed.  The other runner gave a brief response, but then made an additional comment calling me by name.  I turned back to find a colleague from the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health where I'd spent 16+ years before moving to the Carey Business School within Johns Hopkins. I'd known this particular colleague first as a student and then as a colleague for almost the entire time.  Her kids' ages are between my first two and my second and third.  We chatted for a bit.

I found myself once again talking about how much I enjoy the new challenges of my position at present compared with what I had been doing.  Some in academia find it difficult to fathom since many in academia are not interested in high level administrative positions and are not necessarily good "people people".  Perhaps I am.  Perhaps I am not.

Regardless, something occurred to me later in the day, long after my colleague and I had parted ways after about seven minutes of an overlapping route.  The very title of this blog is about connecting dots and nourishing the soul.  When I came up with the title, I was really focused on the dots as abstract things in my own life and my own soul.  However, the management style that is encouraged at the Johns Hopkins Carey Business School includes thinking about team members strengths, weaknesses, and aspirations as individuals.  The strengths and weaknesses can then be extended to the team as a whole.  The team is "connecting the dots" in which the dots are individuals who make up the teams as we try to construct the best teams for getting the jobs that are important done.  While not everyone on the team may even believe in souls, the fact that we are seeking to find ways to help individuals reach aspirations and grow personally and professionally is key.  This demonstrates a key overlap between what I think of for myself and what I now am called upon to think of for others as I grow in my own leadership.  It is another wonderful case of how I am able to fit everything in my life together in a way that makes sense.

Is everyone lucky enough to be able to make sense of their lives?  No.

Does everyone seek to make sense of their lives in the same way?  I doubt it.

But it works for me and it helps me to see my life as one big adventure that fits together in the workplace and outside in ways that complement each other.

Moving ahead, one of the biggest challenges will be to assure that the inside the workplace part of my life and outside the workplace part of my life not only fit together conceptually but also fit together in terms of getting things done and focusing on both parts.  If I work too hard and don't focus on life outside that will bring issues outside the workplace that I do not want to face.  If I focus too much on things outside the workplace and do not get done important tasks inside, that will bring its own set of challenges.

Balance is as important as parallel alignment.  That is a real challenge.