More of My Baltimore--Many Baltimores Coming Together

This is a story of six amazing women, two amazing university's, and a talented son, all of whom are important parts of my Baltimore. 

Some people use the phrase "worlds colliding" when what seem to be differently compartmentalized parts of their lives intersect.  For my Baltimore, I like to use the phrase "many Baltimores blending together."  In part, because I find the image of blending more appealing than the image of colliding.  In part, because I truly think that in my Baltimore it is more of a blending than a collision.  My city is a wonderful mixture of different elements that sometimes are far apart but other times are brought together.  And in my existence they are all there and mixed together in a way that makes an incredible whole.  It is easy to imagine different ingredients in a mixing bowl that come together and end up as an amazing and integrated whole as the hypothetical electric mixer turns them all together.

My middle son is about to graduate from the Baltimore School for the Arts.  Yesterday was the third annual Courting Art event at which art from students at the city's high schools was on display in the lobby of the Eastside Courthouse.  The art that was there yesterday plus some other pieces were on display at a local community college some time ago.  The pieces on display yesterday were finalists.  

The Eastside Courthouse is a building that I have driven past for years but never been inside.  Yesterday's trip inside was interesting as I learned the interesting fact that all the civil and criminal domestic violence cases are heard there.  I heard from speakers including the CEO of Baltimore City Schools (i.e., superintendent), Judge Weinstein and Chief Judge Barbera.

I have seen each of these three powerful women speak before.  The Superintendent had spoken at a local networking breakfast.  She presents an amazingly hopeful and powerful image of public education in Baltimore City.  She apologized for having to leave early for an event for her own children.  I am glad to know that she is grounded in her own family-based reality.

Judge Weinstein is an amazing woman.  I'd also seen her speak at a networking event and know of her ties to and dedication to finding ways to guide local veterans when they have to interact with the legal system.  I had no idea of her interest in art and local public education.  In retrospect, it is no surprise that she has an interest in those areas--it is reflective of her overall interest in and investment in Baltimore as a community with amazing potential.  It turns out that she was also the supervisor for the colleague closest to me on the organizational chart at the Carey Business School right now when my colleague was interning during the completion of her law studies. Judge Weinstein also mentioned that the Courting Art idea had come from Montgomery County, Pennsylvania, close to where I'd grown up.

Chief Judge Barbera is the chief judge of the Maryland Court of Appeals (what my state calls its state level Supreme Court).  I had seen her speak when my closest mentee and running partner was sworn into the Maryland State Bar in 2016.  She was one of several judges who spoke about the importance of art in students' training and the importance of art in the courtroom.  She, as with others, noted the strong emotions with which people come to a courthouse.  She noted the calming effect of giving people something to look at and ponder other than the bare walls of the courthouse.  I would have heard all the same words she spoke whether I'd seen her before or not.  For me, however, somehow it seemed to make a difference in how I heard her knowing what her position was and what that position means.  More than anything else, knowing that she chose to invest some of her time in this effort in light of all the other things she has to do was impressive.

Finally, I met one of my son's teachers with whom I had not crossed paths in some time.  She is a wonderful and energetic teacher who was clearly connected with the other city art teachers who were at the event.  And she commented on the fact that I had a light blue rose brooch.  She asked if there was some significance.  I told her that it was just my way of trying to add some flare to otherwise conservative business attire and that I was fortunate to work with a local tailor whose shop carried an array of colors of rose brooches.  

So, in one evening I heard from three amazing women who represent crossing paths with two other amazing women (my colleague and mentee).  I met a fourth amazing women who was fascinated by a fashion choice that is a function of advice given to me by my boss and opportunities presented by my tailor.  And all of this is because of the investment in my son's art that another amazing woman (my wife) and I have been willing to make over time and that Baltimore City provides opportunities for within the public school system. 

In conclusion, while my son's art was not chosen among the top five, the top two received not only scholarship money but access to a summer program at MICA. My son will be attending MICA as a student starting this fall and the business school at which I am vice dean for education partners with MICA to offer a design leadership program.  It is wonderful seeing the local art college making an investment in the city's public education as well.  

Overlapping Lessons for Me and My Nine Year Old Son

Today was another “last” before the Philadelphia Marathon.  The last run planned as a progression run.  7 miles.  Started at 8:00 and worked my way down to 6:30.  Did it on the treadmill.  Felt easy enough that I decided to challenge myself a little more than normal at the end.  So, instead of just running the 7 miles with the pace getting faster by 15 seconds each mile, I did that and I made sure to increase the incline each quarter mile during the last mile.  With just an easy 4 on Monday and two 7-mile quality workouts, my legs are more than ready to go.  It has been wonderful to have a feeling of complete confidence in a workout like this.  Of course, I did not go outside to run—I didn’t like the cold this morning and the person I was supposed to run with had a good reason for backing out—but the treadmill work was just plain solid.  Leaves me with 10 days until the race.  Now at 1948.5 miles, with 6 more workouts to go before the marathon.  Getting ever closer.  Still pondering what I will do with my running after this.  Still don’t have an answer.  But maybe I don’t need one.  And I don’t need the pressure of figuring one out at this moment.

So, what else was interesting since the last entry? 

Three things.  First, I had an interesting discussion with a colleague about seeing the dots and not only connecting the dots, but realizing that there is something wlaw in the space between the dots.  I liked his vision of realizing that there is something else there.  I had never expressed it that way before.  It is sort of like not only seeing the stars in a constellation but also drawing in the entire “figure” around the constellation as illustrations of Orion and Capricorn or Ursa Major and Ursa Minor would show.  Or in a coloring book with connecting the dot activities to connect the dots and then color in the figure and add to the figure.  To not just make the connections but to innovate from them and to build upon them.

Second, I finally had an opportunity for my direct supervisor to find out about my tattoo.  More than one and one-half years of working under his supervision and finally a reason for him to find out—although most other people within the school know.  Having traveled to San Antonio (as I mentioned earlier this week), when I had my first one-on-one meeting with the Dean after I returned, he observed “no cowboy boots?”  I said, “No, not me.”  Then he ran down other things that he apparently associates with Texas including asking “No tattoos?”  I had not paused before any others, but I did pause before that one.  The pause startled the Dean, so he looked without asking, “Right?”  And I told him that I didn’t need to because I already had one.  He was taken by surprise but didn’t feel the need to ask why.  He assumed it would have been at an earlier age.  Of course, in reality it was finished just before I was offered the job. 

Third, my nine year old is worrying about things that he really doesn’t need to worry about as a nine year old.  Yesterday, he drew a wonderful picture of a dragon for a nine-year old.  He asked, “What should I do?  I like engineering [a reference to his joining a 4-H Robotics club], music [he takes both bass violin and guitar lessons and plays recorder well], and art [his drawings].”  He wondered how he would make a choice about college.  I realized that having an older brother already in college and a second in ninth grade who is thinking ahead about college, he has the idea that he will someday need to make a choice.  I simply assured him that it would be a long time before he would have to make a decision.  He definitely should not be required to think about such issues now.  That is a lot of stress for 18 year olds when they are making the choice.  It is a silly stress for a nine-year old who is eight years from the choice. 

But then I think back to what I wrote about the pressures of what to do after the marathon.  And even more importantly I think about the unnecessary pressures I put on myself for the marathon.  Does it really matter whether I run a sub-3:10 in the Philadelphia Marathon?  No.  Some day when I pass no one will say, “He failed to run a sub-3:10 marathon.”  And no one will say, “His life was so amazing because he did.”  Yes, it is a goal.  Yes, I have spent a long time preparing.  Yes, I would be elated to meet the goal and disappointed to fail.  But even in failure there would be life lessons.  So, the more I just let go of the stress, put my heart in the run, and do it, the better off I will be.  And in all likelihood, the higher the chance that all the effort will work to achieve the goal—rather than trying and failing.  Allowing things to “just happen” can make them much easier.

A lesson for me.

Connecting the dots forward in time, a lesson for my son some day. 

If you would like to hear my interpretation of this with some new introduction and conclusion music, please click here.  

My First Post Boston Marathon Blog--Living Life to the Fullest

It took me a while to be ready to write after running the Boston Marathon and experiencing (from afar--thankfully) the events afterwards.  I wrote this to share with a small publication within JHSPH that is run by students but thought I would share here as well.  I will have a lot more to write about the marathon in the coming weeks. 

Inspiration from an Eight Year Old I Did Not Know

People sometimes ask me why I lead such a busy life.  I see it as a rich and full life that also happens to be busy rather than just a busy life.  But, leaving semantics behind, I would like to use my Boston Marathon 2013 experience to frame and answer to this question once and for all. 

On April 15, 2013, I ran my first (and for the foreseeable future only) Boston Marathon.  I had worked for three years to get there.  I decided to run a marathon in January 2010.  I started my training for the 2010 Baltimore Marathon in May of that year and over the next 22 months ran a total of four marathons before I finally qualified for Boston.  April 15 was described in advance by one of my training partners as the pinnacle of the running side of my life and she encouraged me to reach for greatness.  From my 3 AM nervous wake up until I finished the race around 1:20 PM, the Boston Marathon was something I could think of as the best running experience I ever had and while I did not run my best marathon time ever I spent every minute of my 3:15:56 with the goal of reaching for excellence in my mind.  Then, even for the first 90 minutes after the race the day continued to be the best running experience ever.  I met up with the two men with whom I’d traveled to Boston.  We all accomplished what we wanted.  We enjoyed some post-race activities and were preparing to return to our hotel and come home. 

That was when the explosions occurred.

My two friends and I were on the subway when someone noticed information about the explosion on Twitter.  Everyone reached for their phones.  As information began to emerge, the subway was evacuated.  We were left wondering about the extent of what happened as multiple emergency vehicles raced by and needing to find an alternative means to return to the hotel.  When we arrived at the hotel more details emerged.  The most heart wrenching of all the details to come out that afternoon and evening was that an eight year old boy who had been there to watch his father was one of the three fatalities associated with the explosions.

That was difficult for me because I have an eight year old.  While my own family had never intended to join me in Boston, they could have.  And no one could have predicted when the explosions were going to occur.  If my family had made slightly different decisions and the attack had been planned slightly differently, that could have been my son.

Reflection on this point led to an interesting Facebook post exchange with a young woman I had mentored when she was a student in the Schreyer Honors College at Penn State, where I had done my undergraduate work.  After she posted about glad for my safety, I posted back, “Thinking of the development I have seen in you since I mentored you in SHC at PSU and the way I lead my life (so busy and so full) this is just a reminder to live life to the fullest EVERY DAY since each of us has no idea when life as a whole or some important part will be pulled out from underneath us in a way we could never guess.”  After that we shared a back an forth about how this same sentiment motivated us both and how I could take at least a little credit for her sharing the sentiment with me. 

My life is full because I don’t want to miss anything and I don’t want my wife and sons to miss anything either.  This point was emphasized by the loss of life not only for the eight year old but also two relatively young other individuals in the explosions and the many serious injuries that will leave lives changed forever.

Do I do a lot?  Yes.  Is it too much to try to fit in?  Possibly.  Do I sometimes wish I had more time to just sit around?  Yes. 

However, when I ask myself what I have gained by leading a full and rich and busy life I find the following.  I have found the person I love to spend my life with (married nearly 21 years now), found multiple personal and community activities I love to be involved with (running, Sunday school teaching, worship band at church), found a job I love and have been successful in (full professor and now vice dean), and brought up three boys who are now 17, 13, and 8 to experience all that life has to offer them at those ages. 

Finishing the Boston Marathon in a near personal best time gets me past one item that was a long-term goal.  However, it was just one goal.  I am only 43 and have what I hope are many years to live and many miles to run before I die.  However, if something had happened to me as a runner on Monday, I would enter whatever comes after life on Earth not worrying that I had missed something. 

The death of the eight year old on Monday is an inspiration to me to renew my commitment to the premise by which I have led my life up to this point and to take that commitment joyfully into the future.  Reaching one goal shouldn’t make me complacent.  It should simply set me up to set and reach other goals.  If the goal is not to miss anything in life, then my wife and my sons and I will be busy. But I think it can be a joyful and happy form of busy reflecting the passions that each of us have for different things in life in which we wish to excel and that we wish to enjoy.